King Kong

Ok, so I must begin with the encounter I had two nights ago with the biggest aracnoid I've even seen in my life.

I'm writing in my journal on my bed in the hotel, peacefully minding my own business in the room alone, when all of a sudden the most massive spider crawls out from under my roommate's bed. King Kong, as I later dubbed him, was surely not a normal spider, but a tarantula, no doubt. My heart stopped for a second because he was only like a foot from my face, which I had positioned on the bed while I was lazily scribing the day's events into my journal. I jumped up onto my knees, and this startled him so he scurried back under the bed and I sat there panting, shaken up like a 4 year old. I didn't know what to do since he was out of sight, so I proceeded to record his existence in my journal. I interupted the line about the places we visited that day by writing "HOLY SH*T THE BIGGEST SPIDER I'VE EVER SEEN JUST APPEARED IN MY ROOM" just because I felt the need to tell somebody. (It's like Tom Hanks having Wilson the volleyball in Castaway, I had my journal) Paniked but helpless, I tried to keep writing until my roommate got back.

King Kong came out again, probably trying to make a dash for the door, knowing that the big human he was sharing quarters with would soon get someone to smash him and end him forever. But he scurried back under the bed again because I jumped so much when he came out again. I can't tell you the fear that I was feeling in those 5 minutes, crazily thinking this was some rabid poisonous Vietnamese exotic breed of tarantual that could easily jump onto my face, latch on and kill me. (Okay, so slightly overreacting, but seriously, I was really perturbed)

Being the noble girl I am, I decided to lift my roommate's things off the floor to prevent King Kong from making his home in her backpack or blanket. (ALthough I'm not gonna lie, I contemplated not telling her he was even in our room because I didn't think I'd be able to get him out and I knew she'd freak out worse than me) But as I harmlessly pulled her backpack off the ground by the foot of her bed, THERE HE WAS! Just sitting there, taunting me. THis time he didn't scurry. I think he knew the end was in sight. I didn't, I thought I was going to die, but he knew. I picked up a paint tray we had in the room for the next day's activity, and slowly lifted it to try and capture him under it until I could find someone to kill him. I'm telling you, a normal swat wouldn't have even affected this guy, he was thicker than a short novel and his body was the size of an egg, with 8 disgusting hairy legs sticking out. EWWWWWWWW. So as I'm standing over him, my bouistrous, ex-cheerleader roommate comes in, making an entrance as usual with a story already unfolding out of her mouth and I'm just like "SHHHHH!!!" one finger poised to my lips, then I point to King Kong. Her eyes widen like cracked yolks in a frying egg and her hands cover a her mouth to prevent a scream. I'm like "I know!" with a horrified yet funny look on my face, trying to make light of the fact that ginormo-spider is our bedmate.

She turns and runs down the hall, searching for someone to end King Kong. Surprisingly, he stays put through all of this. Our friends come in, and soon we've got a plan. I provoke him just a little with the paint tray and he begins to run to an open area of the floor. I throw the tray down on top of him, thinking "VICTORY IS MINE!" when he uses his King Kong strength to just lift up the tray and continue running along! I SCREAM and everyone screams and he runs under a lounging chair. The fight isn't over. The professor comes in, wondering what all the fuss is about and we tell him in that way that little girls tell their dad's "There's a HUGE spider in here!" Except that usually huge constitues a tiny speck of a thing. I see the skepticism on his face. He decides to lift the chair while our other comrade holds a boot ready to smush King Kong to smitherines. "1, 2, 3..." Prof counts, then he lifts up the chair, and sees the massiveness that is this beast, and Rocky tries to kill it with his boot. When he misses, King Kong starts to scuttle, dancing around like he's drunk, crazily trying to escape certain death. Seeing that we weren't overestimating this thing's size, Professor Smith starts hopping around like he's on hot coals! trying to avoid King Kong's wrath! And my roommate and I are just screaming and screaming as this spider stalks around our room! We've jumped op onto my bed and are holding each other and screaming bloody murder! And then the spider starts climbing the drapes! It seems like King Kong will survive and spend the night in our room with us, and it's scary and funny and horrifying and ridicuolous all at the same time how freaked out we all are, when all of a sudden Prof grabs the drapes, exposes King Kong and Rocky lays out the boot, showing no mercy to this giant spider's terror. King Kong is dead, his remains smeared on our wall and curtain, Prof takes the rest to a letrine graveyard somewhere else in the hotel.

When all the madness is over, and rooms and I have calmed down, Professor returns. More like a father-figure friend on this trip than a faculty supervisor, he empathizes with our fright over the spider from planet enormous. Just as we're about to all go to bed, Professor offers some presumptively comforting words. He says to my roommate, "Kelly, if you went missing, what's the first thing that would happen?" Confused and not seeing where this is going, Kelly replies "I don't know?" And with an evil grin on his face, Prof. David Smith replies "Wouldn't your family come looking for you?"

The End.